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I have my mug of coffee in hand, please help yourself to one, as we visit with an old friend of CMah Reads.  Today’s guest visited back in 2011, so when she contacted me, asking if she could come back and visit, I put the coffee on!!  I ask, if you could help me give a warm welcome back to Madeline Sharples!!

MADELINE SHARPLES

Madeline Sharples studied journalism in high school and college and wrote for the high school newspaper, but only started to fulfill her dream to work as a creative writer and journalist late in life. Her memoir, Leaving the Hall Light On: A Mother’s Memoir of Living with Her Son’s Bipolar Disorder and Surviving His Suicide, was released in a hardback edition in 2011 and has just been released in paperback and eBook editions by Dream of Things. It tells the steps she took in living with the loss of her oldest son, first and foremost that she chose to live and take care of herself as a woman, wife, mother, and writer. She hopes that her story will inspire others to find ways to survive their own tragic experiences.

She also co-authored Blue-Collar Women: Trailblazing Women Take on Men-Only Jobs (New Horizon Press, 1994), co-edited the poetry anthology, The Great American Poetry Show, Volumes 1 and 2, and wrote the poems for two photography books, The Emerging Goddess and Intimacy (Paul Blieden, photographer). Her poems have also appeared online and in print magazines.

Madeline’s articles appear regularly in the Naturally Savvy, PsychAlive, Aging Bodies, and Open to Hope. She also posts at her blogs, Choices and at Red Room and is currently writing a novel.  Madeline’s mission since the death of her son is to raise awareness, educate, and erase the stigma of mental illness and suicide in hopes of saving lives.

Madeline and her husband of forty plus years live in Manhattan Beach, California, a small beach community south of Los Angeles. Her younger son Ben lives in Santa Monica, California with his wife Marissa.
You can connect with Madeline at her blog, Facebook and Twitter.

GUEST POST

My Recipe for Survival

When my older son Paul took his life in our home – ending his seven year struggle with bipolar disorder, my first thoughts were: I cannot go on. I want to get into the same bathtub where he died and put myself out of my pain and misery. At first I didn’t know how I could continue to live without him.

Instead of getting into that bathtub, I chose to live and take care of myself as a woman, wife, mother, writer. Here’s how I did it.

I Wrote. Even before Paul died, I started writing about him and his bipolar disorder. Journaling got out the frustrations of dealing with his episodes, hospitalizations, and erratic behavior. After he died I continued journaling. I also took classes through UCLA Extension’s writing program, a private writing instructor in Los Angeles, and at workshops at my healing place, Esalen in Big Sur, California. It was there that poems started flowing from my pen.

 I Worked. At the time Paul died, I was working at home writing grant proposals. I soon realized that I needed to find a job outside, and luckily I got rehired into the company I had retired from a few years earlier. My job as a proposal manager was challenging, meaningful, and very stressful. Having to meet stringent deadlines kept my mind on the job rather than on my feelings. The work and the socialization at work helped get me through the first few years after Paul died.

I Sought Out Diversions. And through all these years I’ve learned to fill up my time with diversions. I read. I watch movies. My husband and I go to the theater and opera. We travel. And I pamper myself – working out at the gym, taking long walks on the beach near our home, eating healthy, and caring for my hair and nails. It feels good, helps me look good, and boosts my mood. Taking care of myself and staying healthy have become tantamount to my survival.

I chose to stay alive because I know what suicide does to a family. I couldn’t put my loving and caring husband and surviving son Ben through that kind of pain again. Besides I wanted to experience life’s next adventures. As bad as it was after Paul died, and as much as I continue to miss him, I still had things to do with my life.

Also, with such a tragedy came some unexpected gifts. Paul’s death has made me a stronger person, physically and emotionally. I have reinvented myself into a poet and creative writer. My husband and I have a stronger marriage because we gave each other the space to grieve in our own way, and I have a terrific bond with Ben and his new wife. Yes, I’m proud to say I’m a new mother-in-law. And, I’ve embarked on a new mission in life – to erase the stigma of mental illness and prevent suicide, in hopes of saving lives through my writing and volunteer work.

Staying alive has also helped me keep my son Paul’s memory alive.

ABOUT THE BOOK

Leaving the Hall Light On is about living after loss: first and foremost how author Madeline Sharples chose to live and go on with life and take care of herself as a woman, wife, mother, writer. It is about the steps Sharples took in living with the loss of her son, including making use of diversions to help ease her grief and the milestones she met toward living a full life without him. She says, “to let ourselves grieve is to feel the depth of our love. For those whose children have died, that may take the rest of our lives, but we will discover the gifts of our loss in the process.”
Read my review here.

THANKS TO AUTHOR, MADELINE SHARPLES AND DREAM OF THINGS,
PUBLISHER, I HAVE ONE COPY OF THIS MEMOIR TO GIVE AWAY.
PRINT- U.S. AND CANADA RESIDENTS OR EBOOK-OPEN TO ALL.

CLICK HERE TO BRING YOU TO
THE GIVEAWAY ENTRY PAGE.

DISCLAIMER
I received a copy of this book, at no charge to me,
in exchange for my honest review.
No items that I receive
are ever sold…they are kept by me,
or given to family and/or friends.

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Leaving The Hall Light On by Madeline Sharples
Published by Dream of Things
Publication Date: July 13, 2012
ISBN-10: 0982579489
ISBN-13: 978-0982579480
Pages: 338
Review Copy from: Dream Of Things
Edition: TPB
My Rating: 4 

Synopsis:
Leaving the Hall Light On is about living after loss: first and foremost how author Madeline Sharples chose to live and go on with life and take care of herself as a woman, wife, mother, writer. It is about the steps Sharples took in living with the loss of her son, including making use of diversions to help ease her grief and the milestones she met toward living a full life without him. She says, “to let ourselves grieve is to feel the depth of our love. For those whose children have died, that may take the rest of our lives, but we will discover the gifts of our loss in the process.”

My Thoughts and Opinion:
Over the past year or so, I have stepped out of my comfort zone, and started reading memoirs. And honestly, the ones that I have read have had a lasting impact on me.

The author shares, very candidly, her journey as, a wife and mother, coping with a son who was diagnosed with a Bipolar Disorder and then his suicide. Her pain and recovery. This book was a bit of a hard read for me because of some of the parallels in the story. A thought provoking read on many levels and for varied reasons.

One of the similarities was I am a parent of 2 sons, 2 1/2 years apart and the oldest named Paul, the same as the author. While reading of her struggle with her son Paul, I found myself asking, “what if it was my Paul? Another thing I could relate to was the Bipolar Disorder, because of my background in nursing, I am familiar with the struggles of those diagnosed with the disease, the patterns they have and the signs and symptoms.

Ms. Sharples shares her painful experience of living through her son’s periods of mania and depression. Her raw emotions are palpable. Then the worst nightmare that every parent fears, burying one’s child. And even worse, not knowing the whys. Does any parent have closure? No such thing. How does one go on? I can’t even imagine, having to go through something like this. She frankly and honestly describes her emotions of love, anger, worry, depression, hope, guilt, and even at times, selfishness. How she used writing poetry, which are also in the book, as a coping mechanism. And the decision to write this, which had to be very painful, memoir. As a parent, it was a heart wrenching read. But it was also a read of survival and recovery. It’s then that the hall light goes off.

A powerful and poignant read!! 

Hosted by Miz B at Should Be Reading

This week’s question:
How do you organize/store your books? Do you go through them often? Or do you pretty much just shelve them and then leave them alone until you need them?

My response:
I love this question and will enjoy seeing how everyone answers.

In my office/reading room, I have 3 bookcases , each having a special purpose.  When I receive a book, the first thing I do is catalogue it to my spreadsheet with the date received, who it is from and any other notations.  I then put a post-it with the same information on the front cover.  I would be lost without my spreadsheet especially for those books that are in my EReaders.

It then goes into my big TBR 5 shelf bookcase, in the order received.  I am now up to 2 1/2 shelves for requested reviews.  The bottom 2 shelves are for personal TBRs that I have either won or purchased.  I also have another smaller 3 shelf bookcase that holds my prized possesions, the signed books, on the first shelf.  The other 2 shelves holds books I have won and need TBR.  The 3rd bookcase is a corner unit, which is a sentimental piece of furniture.  It was my grandmother’s, and even though it doesn’t match the other furniture in my office,  I think of her when I look at it.  This bookcase holds the books I have read along with some photo albumns.

However, there  may be some rearrangement this coming weekend, since I ordered a new desk for my office, which is supposed to be delivered this week.  I am so excited because my desk now is a mess, unable to hold all my computer and office items.  This is the one I purchased:

December is being hosted by Suko’s Notebook

Mailbox Monday was created by Marcia of A girl and her books and is now on tour.
According to Marcia, “Mailbox Monday is the gathering place for readers to share the books that came into their house last week. Warning: Mailbox Monday can lead to envy, toppling TBR piles and humongous wish lists.”
Click on titles for synopsis via IndieBound (I am an IndieBound Affliate)

Monday:  Last Chance Christmas by Hope Ramsay from GCP/Forever
Monday: Hunk for the Holidays by Katie Lane from GCP/Forever
Wednesday: Private London by James Patterson from The Hachette Book Group
Wednesday: Remembering Christmas by Dan Walsh recommended by Gina @ Hott Books (personal d/l)
Saturday: Things Left Unspoken by Eva Marie Everson recommended by Gina @ Hott Books (personal d/l)

If you follow this blog, then you know I have a weakness for reading challenges.  I am trying my best to contain myself from signing up for as many as I did last year.  And so far I have been good, however, it is still early!!

Two challenges are being added today, which brings me up to 6 as of this moment.

One challenge is a new one for me so I have to give it a try.  Plus who doesn’t want to live in a mansion lol?

The other one that I am signing up for today is another fun favorite.  Even though I didn’t complete it for this year, it is still fun to see where I have travelled to with the books I read.

Here are the details in case you want to join me:

I was so excited when Tracy from Media Muscle/The Book Trib contacted me about today’s guest.  It has been a while since he was last here, but today, he is back to tell us about his latest novel.  So I ask, as only you can do, to give a warm welcome to an old friend, Allan Topol!!

ALLAN TOPOL

 Allan Topol is the national bestselling author of seven novels of international intrigue. He is a graduate of Carnegie Institute of Technology who majored in chemistry, abandoned science, and obtained a law degree from Yale University. A partner in a major Washington law firm, and an avid wine collector, Topol has traveled extensively, researching dramatic locations for his novels. He is a contributor to the Yale Law Report, Glenn Beck’s online magazine, and Military.com. You can visit him at www.AllanTopol.com for more information.

ABOUT THE BOOK

National bestselling author, Allan Topol, returns to the scene of the crime with his second Craig Page Thriller and sequel to The China Gambit, THE SPANISH REVENGE (Vantage Point; $14.95; September 2012). This time around, Craig Page, the bold and daring EU Director of Counterterrorism, must once again team up with the resourceful Elizabeth Crowder, a newspaper reporter, to stop a feared terrorist, Ahmed Sadi, whose goal is to provoke a Muslim uprising in Western Europe.

With help from The China Gambit villain, Chinese General Zhou, Ahmed plans to launch an attack against Christianity and retake militarily, a portion of Southern Spain, for Islam. Relying on a medieval parchment claiming that Queen Isabella ceded a portion of Southern Spain to the Muslims, Ahmed has one major problem: Craig Page is hot on his trail and determined as ever to save the world.

THANKS TO TRACY FROM MEDIA MUSCLE, I HAVE ONE (1)
COPY OF THIS BOOK TO GIVE AWAY. U.S. RESIDENTS ONLY.

CLICK HERE TO BRING YOU TO
THE GIVEAWAY ENTRY PAGE

DISCLAIMER
I received a copy of this book, at no charge to me,
in exchange for my honest review.
No items that I receive
are ever sold…they are kept by me,
or given to family and/or friends.